i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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