Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
