This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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