Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
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