Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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