You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize