I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
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