Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
never play flip cup with pint glasses
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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