the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
No I am not eating basil off your cock
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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