Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Randomize
