we have pet lesbian snakes
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
