Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
