You work out of a Hotel?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i out mim tonsoeep
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