Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
