Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
vagina is talking i cant
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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