Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Green mimosas i think yes
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
