She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
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I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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