Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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