You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
