All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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