Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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