you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize