Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Are we still banned from the library?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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