they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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