3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
