I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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