oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
