So drunk its hurt
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize