they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize