69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
