And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
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I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
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When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?