Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.