hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Less talking, more tequila
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
