do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize