no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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