this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
