The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize