I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
