my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
