i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
