So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.