Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off. http://tfl.nu/irzu
  Replies (22) Good night (2971) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college. http://tfl.nu/jk80
  Replies (30) Good night (1381) Bad night (5815)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian. http://tfl.nu/n8zg
  Replies (32) Good night (7638) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick http://tfl.nu/5pdl
  Replies (7) Good night (4137) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious http://tfl.nu/hqe9
  Replies (16) Good night (4701) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living. http://tfl.nu/sgz4
  Replies (9) Good night (3781) Bad night (1004)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (229): please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room. http://tfl.nu/c4g1
  Replies (19) Good night (7444) Bad night (1077)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit. http://tfl.nu/6hvl
  Replies (30) Good night (1100) Bad night (8620)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer. http://tfl.nu/9691
  Replies (7) Good night (3794) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless. http://tfl.nu/cahf
  Replies (4) Good night (2981) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head http://tfl.nu/vzhl
  Replies (5) Good night (827) Bad night (2526)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money. http://tfl.nu/bov0
  Replies (3) Good night (2201) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM. http://tfl.nu/tstz
  Replies (4) Good night (2485) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I love you more with every blowjob.

  (1-202): View more from Washington, DC

  You should write for Hallmark.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): I love you more with every blowjob. (1-202): You should write for Hallmark. http://tfl.nu/2s1x
  Replies (8) Good night (3192) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): God I feel like the rain man of hangovers. http://tfl.nu/3opn
  Replies (3) Good night (906) Bad night (570)

Randomize