So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize