Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
