so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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