Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Succeeded.

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  (404): I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life? (503): Succeeded. http://tfl.nu/i020
  Replies (7) Good night (4462) Bad night (514)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men

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  (804): Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men http://tfl.nu/7ncn
  Replies (39) Good night (1043) Bad night (2394) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  you left your dildo in my car

  (516): View more from New York

  rules of finders keepers apply

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  (516): you left your dildo in my car (516): rules of finders keepers apply http://tfl.nu/0377
  Replies (20) Good night (3437) Bad night (1218)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen

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  (919): I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen http://tfl.nu/2b2i
  Replies (472) Good night (3981) Bad night (6430) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.

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  (608): her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm. http://tfl.nu/qvd0
  Replies (58) Good night (7049) Bad night (643) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.

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  (907): I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement. http://tfl.nu/8kf2
  Replies (13) Good night (4234) Bad night (748) Order T-Shirt
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  (347): View more from New York

  He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.

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  (347): He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones. http://tfl.nu/swc2
  Replies (4) Good night (660) Bad night (2661) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.

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  (631): It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots. http://tfl.nu/yevq
  Replies (1) Good night (2231) Bad night (471) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Trying to grind with crutches was not a success

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  (403): Trying to grind with crutches was not a success http://tfl.nu/guu3
  Replies (7) Good night (1624) Bad night (1147) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.

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  (907): Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina. http://tfl.nu/hpd0
  Replies (36) Good night (2596) Bad night (661) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that

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  (425): He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that http://tfl.nu/3z2y
  Replies (14) Good night (594) Bad night (1970) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.

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  (781): I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name. http://tfl.nu/dhok
  Replies (15) Good night (571) Bad night (1132) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED

  (+04): View more from

  Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.

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  (314): CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED (+04): Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you. http://tfl.nu/xp3j
  Replies (9) Good night (2325) Bad night (572)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Now back to adults eating hotdogs.

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  (402): Now back to adults eating hotdogs. http://tfl.nu/i07d
  Replies (3) Good night (545) Bad night (340) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.

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  (440): I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding. http://tfl.nu/u15s
  Replies (17) Good night (2014) Bad night (342) Order T-Shirt

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