There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
