talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
