Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
