fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
