he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
