I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Randomize
